One thing I’ve noticed about myself is that I am always pursuing the next idea, the next book, the next course, the next podcast, as if something within will help me “figure things out”. I seem to have this sense that life will be better or easier when I figure things out, even though I suspect I am just fooling myself.
But why does the pursuit feel so good?
I think it’s because I feel like I am doing something, something productive. I must believe I am not where I should be, so I have to do SOMETHING to try and get there.
But where is THERE? There is not here.
I must not want to be HERE. What is wrong with here? Why does here feel so painful. Why shouldn’t I be here? I mean, I AM here, right? Everything I’ve done in my life brought me to this point. To here.
Has my whole life up to this point been a waste?
When I get THERE, will I allow myself to be in the present moment? Because then, there will be here.
How will I know when there and here meet and overlap? Will I have this triumphant feeling and think, “I have arrived! No more pursuit is necessary!”
Or will THERE simply become the new HERE while yet another THERE appears on the horizon?
Is here the new there or is there the new here?
Where do I spend the most of my time and energy? Here or there? Do I dismiss what is and cherish what could be?
What would it feel like, just for one moment, to live HERE? To cherish here?
To whisper softly to myself, “Hey…are you here?”