If you are someone who has the superpower of going to the grocery store wearing only your payment method and a smile, you already have a good relationship with uncertainty. And you have two options.
- Stop right now and read something that you can relate to.
- Keep reading and feel even better about yourself that you already do.
Still here? OK, don’t say I didn’t warn you 😉
You’re traveling through another dimension — a dimension not only of sight and sound but of mind. A journey into a wondrous land whose boundaries are that of imagination. That’s a signpost up ahead: your next stop: The Grocery Zone!
The Perfect Shopping List
Let me begin by saying I have been complimented (on more than one occasion) by grocery clerks who notice my shopping lists. That I take great pleasure from these accolades may give you a peek into my personality…but I digress.
Creating the perfect shopping list is a goal for me for several reasons.
- I have a terrible memory, plus I’m easily distractable. And I can forget items even if they are ON the list, so not having a list is not an option.
- The grocery store can be very loud, people-y and distracting, so I need a focal point to keep me from getting overwhelmed and stressed.
- I do not want to have to go back until next week, so I like to give myself the best odds of making that happen.
Del Boca Vista Phase III
My perfect shopping list occurs in 3 distinct phases, each equally important parts of this process.
First is the random list which is a thought download of everything I can think of off the top of my head in addition to everything that we’ve noted on the “We Need” board throughout the week in addition to any ingredients for specific meals.
Second is the organized list, which consists of two columns: Sam’s and Publix. I transfer items to the Sam’s column first because there are fewer. Then I transfer the items to the Publix column, making sure to list them in the order we will encounter them as we wind our way through the store.
Third is the completed list which simply the organized list, but with lines through each item as they enter the cart. Boom, done. See you next week!
A Great Loss
We started our grocery journey as usual this past Saturday. Organized list and pen, clipped to clipboard, were ready to go. We made it through Sam’s without a hitch. But upon exiting the store, I had a hard time keeping up with Danny as he practically raced to our car through the Florida summer afternoon heat and humidity.
When I finally caught up to him, I grabbed my clipboard out of the cart and saw that somewhere in his bumpy trek across the parking lot, my pen had fallen off. I scanned as far as I could see and no pen was to be found.
I got in the car and began digging through my purse for another pen and remembered that I had cleaned my purse out earlier in the week and took two pens out that were in the way. I began to get nervous now. I dug through loose change, receipts and old lip balms in the center console. Nothing.
I turned my attention next to the glove box hoping against hope to find some long-forgotten writing instrument hidden among the piles of car maintenance documents, paper napkins and plastic barf bags. Nothing. Not even a crappy pen from a 5k goodie bag!
Can’t Get You Out of my Head
You may be wondering why this is such a big deal if I have my carefully curated list. Couldn’t I just follow the list in order and be a little more careful since I wasn’t crossing anything off? Well, today of all days, I had skipped the organized list step and only had the random list. Why oh why, would I do this to myself? Today of all days!
As we pulled into the Publix parking lot, I silently comforted myself. “It will be fine. You can do it without a pen. You’ll just have to be extra careful. It’s fine.”
That worked for the 25 seconds it took me to walk to the entrance, at which point I considered asking for a pen at the customer service desk. I immediately thought better of it. They’ve probably played that game before. “I promise I’ll return your pen!” and they never see it again.
I thought I remembered a supply of miniature golf style pencils on the same rack as the free shopping lists and weekly ad, but then I remembered that was IKEA.
Would it be crazy to buy a pack of pens just to put an end to this anxiety and discomfort? “Not crazy, but no, we aren’t doing that. Just suck it up. You’ve got this.” (For the record, I did not believe this, but I took a deep breath, mustered all my shopping strength and soldiered on.)
Can You Tell Me How to Get…
As we approached and wound our way through each department I scanned and rescanned my list, reciting it in my mind until I had each item.
“Produce: Salad, green onions, bell pepper and two little bananas for Clara.”
“Produce: Salad, green onions, bell pepper and two little bananas for Clara.”
“Produce: Salad, green onions, bell pepper and two little bananas for Clara.”
“Produce: Salad, green onions, bell pepper and two little bananas for Clara.”
I had a flashback to my early childhood to an episode of Sesame Street called “I Can Remember”. In this episode a little girl heads off to the local shop to pick up three items for her mom: A loaf of bread, a container of milk and a stick of butter. She repeats it to herself the whole way, momentarily forgets the butter, but feels excited and proud when she remembers and takes the items home to her mom. She exclaims, “I remembered!”
I made it through the rest of the store, reciting my department list of items along the way and made it home safe and sound with each item on the list. It might seem ridiculous, but I felt a sense of relief, pride and excitement. I remembered too!
Upon further Review
The next day, a bit removed from the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat, I couldn’t help but wonder why the pen thing felt like such a big deal. What did I need so desperately in that moment that the pen could provide?
Certainty.
For me, going into the grocery store without my well-curated list and my trusty pen, would feel incredibly uncertain. I might forget things and have to come back or do without. Uncertainty now might lead to even more uncertainty later in the week.
Certainty gives me the gifts of safety and comfort, which are great. But uncertainty come with its own set of gifts to unwrap. Uncertainty gives me a chance to learn – to learn how to deal with unpleasant emotions, learn to try new things. Learn that everything doesn’t have to be perfect, it can just be fine, or even imperfect.
A more practical takeaway from this experience is my vow to stock pens in every nook and cranny of my life. You know, just in case. But on those occasions where I am teetering in penless uncertainty, I know the invisible ink of my mind is the best back up plan.
Is Uncertainty Standing between You and Your Goals?
You can unleash your full potential, even in the face of uncertainty. I can help you gain confidence, embrace uncertainty, and achieve your goals. Of this, I am certain.
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