Have you ever shared something with someone and regretted it almost immediately?
I think we’ve all been there. It could be in the form of an overshare or TMI. Or maybe a thought you’ve had or a dream you’d like to pursue. You put something out there, quite innocently, and suddenly you wish you’d just kept your mouth shut.
In my case, I was explaining a concept I was working on to a mentor and she just didn’t get it. She said she was confused. To make things worse, she said the reason she was confused was because I seemed confused.
I had been SO excited to talk about this concept and was just chattering away, completely in the moment, without a care in the world. And suddenly it felt like the wind had been taken out of my sails and I was sinking fast.
I finished out the last few minutes of the session, then ruminated on the conversation for the rest of the day and into the next morning. When I sat down to do my usual journaling, my mind felt blank. I couldn’t stop thinking about that stupid conversation. Since it wasn’t going away, I decided to journal about it and that’s when I had a few light bulb moments.
- Just because someone doesn’t understand me, doesn’t mean I did anything wrong.
- Not all my thoughts are for public consumption.
- My goals only have to make sense to me.
- My thought babies are precious, and I choose who can be entrusted with their care.
- My people will understand. If they don’t understand, they may not be my people.
These realizations brought such relief to me in that moment, and in the wake of that relief, I wrote furiously and passionately about the whole experience. There may have even been some tears. Here’s a snippet:
If you have a goal, be careful who you share it with. I’m not saying don’t share it but treat your goal with exquisite care. If your goal is not ready for public consumption, and it may never be, keep it to yourself. Your goal is just as precious and important and worthwhile whether anyone else ever knows about it. Ever. Happier goals are goals that are personal, meaningful. They mean something to you, whether it doesn’t mean anything to anyone else on this earth. If your goal makes you happier. That’s all that matters.
Betsy is a certified life coach and blogger who helps midlife women find satisfaction where they are now and inspiration to go after their big goals.
To learn more about working with Betsy, click here.